Use "Postage Paid" Envelopes to mail a brick to junk mailers!

Bulk rated packages almost ready to go

Mail your own brick to junk mailers today!

Step one: Get the "No Postage Necessary" envelope out of the junk mail.

Step two: Put a brick (or anything) in a box.

Step three: Tape the "No Postage Necessary" envelope neatly to the box

Step four: Put it into those blue mail boxes, the parcel dump at the post office, or in your mail box.

You know those obnoxious "refinance your home" or credit card scams offers that you get in the mail? This is called direct marketing, where marketers use a reduced bulk postal rate to send entire forests of paper mail to you.

So this is something you can do in response.

Find a shoebox, or a storage bin, or any cardboard box you have laying around. Fill it up with bricks, big blocks of iron, or maybe cement. Tape the box up with everyday packaging tape. Use a junkmail's postage-paid envelope and tape it neatly to the top cover of the box. NEATLY. And mail it off. Envelope revenge!

A few days later, your package shows up at the junk mailer's location, and they have to pay for every cent of delivery. Once the cost outweighs the benefit, they will stop sending out direct mail marketing material. And that is my goal.

Doing this has the following beneficial side effects:

-Since these companies pay the post office, this lightens the load taxpayers need to pay to keep the post office operating

-This creates employment opportunities. The post office keeps cutting staff because of lack of buisness; this gives the post office a huge source of income from the credit card scam companies.

-This will lead to more cautious bulk mailing. Maybe these junk mailers simply don't know they are annoying people? Hopefully they will learn very quickly!

-This makes me laugh maniacly, like a cartoon supervillan.

-This saves trees. Once enough of us do this, the junk mail companies will stop sending us junk. Or at least they will be more discriminate about it. It will save trees and keep the landfills empty! Yay!

-If we do this enough, the USPS will make so much money, that they will lower postage costs.

All of my spare change these days (small revenue made from ads for instance) goes DIRECTLY towards this project. Usually that means boxes, but right now I'm saving up to buy a bunch of concrete.


Dear Bulk Mailer,

Please find attached to your no-postage-necessary envelope, this brick. I figured with all these great junk mails you send me every month, you'd like something in return! I know it costs twenty cents for every ounce I mail to you, so I hope it doesn't weigh too much more than an ounce.

-Resident or Homeowner

New! Give your oppinion, send pics, etc: forums

Q: How much does this cost the recipient?
A: Junk mailers PAY about twenty cents an ounce. That means an eight pound package COSTS THEM about $25. And all of the proceeds go directly to the United States Postal Service.

Q: Can you do this with email spam?
A: Sure can!

Q: Does this actually work?
A: Someone used my company's buisness-reply from inside the magazine, and taped it to a box. That's how I know this works

Q: What is the weight limit?
A: I've heard rumors that it is 13 ounces, but the box that was sent to the magazine I work for was twenty two pounds.

Q: Is this legal?
A: Just don't send hazardous materials (ie batteries), or things considered unhealthy (ie dirty underwear). Seriously, no dirty underwear.

Q: Are you sure I can't mail underwear?
A: Well if you do, mail me a picture. Like these: thongs

Q: Does this cost anything?
A: No. What's wrong with you

Q: Does this help American families?
A: Yes. The United States postal Service employs nearly two million people. These numbers are going down drasticly because of increased e-mail use. This junk mail program signifigantly increases USPS income generation, which allows the government to employ more people. We at Dear Bulk Mailer are pro-family, pro-jobs, and pro-America.

Q: Is this myspace?
A: No. wtf?

Q: Does this work in the UK?
A: I don't know, maybe one of my UK buddies can tell me!

Q: Do the bar codes track you?
A: No. In fact, if you put the envelopes side by side, most of them have the same barcode. They just tell the Post Office machines what type of postage they should have.

Q: How do you choose which junk mailer to send these packages to?
A: Any -- and every -- junk mailer that gives you a postage-paid envelope.

Q: Where do I get free boxes?
A: Be creative. Shoeboxes, boxes you buy things in... Even paper works if you tape it up neatly. Just make sure everything is nice and neat, and doesn't resemble some sort of unibomber contraption, and you'll be fine.

Q: Can I use this to get free postage to recipients other than junk mailers?
A: No. That is illegal, and you're stupid.

Q: Can I send drugs?
A: No, stupid!

Q: How do I show pictures of what I sent?
A: Here!

Q: Can I send....
A: DO NOT SEND ANYTHING HARMFUL OR ILLEGAL. This is supposed to be fun and entertaining, and you should not hurt anyone in the slightest. For instance, hurting a spam company in the wallet is good...hurting a person in their mailing room is very, very bad.

The original package, with two bricks inside of it.


"Have you ever wondered what to do with old text books that you already read for college, but can't bear to throw away? Give it new life and slap a business reply envelope to it. Ship it out and it will find a great new home at Capital One."

"I used a shoebox, and carefully tapied it all up nice and neat. I put a week's worth of news papers fit into this one!"



"I recently bought a desk fan from Target. I didn't have any boxes around so I used the box the fan came in. The mailman assured me it would get to its destination"


"I didn't know what to do with my old broken blender so I just shipped it to these guys. Is that okay?"


Disclaimer: Don't be stupid. If you're stupid, that's not my fault. But if you end up being stupid, you should totally take pictures of it. I am not affiliated with the Post Office, USPS, or any government anything, in any manner. Also, I've never done any of these things ever. Wink wink. Oh, and these thongs were not stolen in a panty raid from the smoking hot sorority chick nxt door. But they were infact washed. OSI